Rumours in the media have it that Ferrari may call on Michael Schumacher to help integrate Ferrari’s new driver Kimi Raikonnen into the team. Italian Newspapers are claiming that team boss Jean Todt has suggested that Michael can help Kimi settle into the ‘Ferrari way of life’ by acting as a ‘mentor’.

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The truth of the matter is that since being awarded his Datuk, the silly hat Jean Todt has been wearing (apart from making him look like an extra from Captain Scarlet) has actually been impeding his hearing (quite how so with tabs that size is beyond my understanding but anyhow….).

Todt apparently misheard Michael and thought he said “I will be a mentor” when in fact the 7 times world champion had been offering his services to the Montana Restaurant across the road from the Maranello outfit and had actually said “I will be the wine monitor”. (presumably getting ready for Kimi’s arrival).

On learning of his mistake Mr Todt has refused to get rid of his hat on the grounds that it makes him at least 20% taller, whether it has any kind of technical advantage over any other team bosses remains to be seen.

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