nosecone.jpgJust mere hours after Honda trialled an ‘innovative’ new aerodynamic package in the form of two dumbo ears attached to the front nose cone of the RA107, the idea has been scrapped and thrown straight in the trash. Testing on the 4th day at Barcelona proved the ‘ears’ gave absolutely no performance or aerodynamic benefit whatsoever, and only seemed to serve to give us all something to laugh about. Here at FFN we are wondering whatever next will come out of Brackley….it’s all very well believing in the ‘power of dreams’ but if we all acted them out willy-nilly well what a chaotic ‘world’ it would be.

Honda Team Boss Nick Fry has come in for some stick of late on various F1 websites, not least for the demoralising effect it must have advertising the fact you want better technical staff when the ones you have are already working night and day trying to dig the team out of the quagmire they are in. He has also come in for some stick for lying about his Curriculum Vitae slightly, as well as the usual complaint that he talks aload of cabbage. Well I can’t help feeling he deserves a bit of verbal grief, if the man put as much energy into ensuring the race operations and development department were properly organised and staffed as he does talking twaddle, the Honda team would be giving the Big Shots of F1 a run for their money by now. We can only hope Honda develop the ‘power of hindsight’ and see the mistake they made hiring this buffoon as the team boss…obviously its not the hot air pumping out the wind tunnel that is the main problem.

Meanwhile it seems the Flexi-floor saga is still rumbling on and is looking like it is hoping to out-last the ‘Mass Pampers’ Affair in it’s attempt to bore us all something silly. It is thought the new tests to be introduced by the FIA at the Spanish Grand Prix will now effect virtually all of the F1 teams (including McLaren who complained in the first place). The quadrupling of the load test to examine the stiffness of the floors is thought to mean that every F1 team will have to revise and stiffen the underbody of their cars to pass the new test. Which I’m sure is making the McLaren Management top of the their technical team’s christmas card list as the poor mites have to go about redesigning the floor. Leading technical figures in F1 however do not see the revisions as having any great impact on the pecking order in the paddock, so basically it has turned out to be a bit of an own goal on McLaren’s score card. Genius. I can’t wait to see what their next cunning plan is.

michaelsailing3.jpgOne chap who just doesn’t seem to understand the meaning of retirement is Michael Schumacher, the 7 times World Champion and ex Ferrari driver has been popping up at social events all over like an outbreak of measles. Well if this is what Ferrari are paying him millions for I think I might drop them a line and offer them my services. I’d quite happily swan about in a bikini while ‘Bilge’ take photos, preach about Road Safety when I’m not allowed a driving licence, hand out shiny pots to handsome young men and then stand about on yachts watching 17 men work their bottoms off, while I’m cracking jokes (and quaffing Kimi’s vodka obviously).

The former World Champion was invited along to be the 18th member on the Team New Zealand’s Yacht in yesterday’s Louis Vutton Cup (doesn’t he make handbags? I’m sure Mark Webber would be interested). The 18th member of the crew is apparently a spectator only and Mr.Schumacher commented it was interesting to see the 17 man crew scurrying about like an army of ants, while he stood about regally surveying it all and comparing how similar it was to watching an F1 pitstop. The only real difference from normal being Michael didn’t get a chance to prang the boat in a set-to with a rival and have to slink back to port to apologize to his team.

lauda.jpgTalking of World Champions, Someone seems to have wound up and set off Triple World Champion, ex-Ferrari driver and current pit-lane mentalist Niki Lauda again. The man seems to pop up like a jack-in-the-box with annoying regularity. This time ‘Nostradamus’ Lauda has changed his mind yet again (I had to lie down from the surprise) and decided that Lewis Hamilton (get your earplugs) is the most likely candidate to win the World Drivers Championship. Despite the fact just a few weeks ago predicting the said same Lewis Hamilton was due for a big career prang because he was a rookie.

According to the Austrian if McLaren can gain the upper hand in development over Ferrari, the World Championship will be a two way fight between Alonso and Hamilton. Of course there is nothing wrong in what he is saying per se, it’s just next week it will all change again, with Fernando Alonso probably being called a has-been, Lewis Hamilton toppling off his gold-plated pedestal and hopefully squashing the ITV F1 commentating team and no doubt hand-bags at 50 paces down at Ferrari between Kimi and Felipe, and we will be waiting for Lauda to say ‘I told you so’.

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