Kimi Raikkonen must have spent his entire childhood walking under ladders and breaking mirrors – how else could you possibly explain the turn of events at Nurburgring? Carl Jung would probably explain it as “temporally coincident occurrences of acausal events” (no not Ron Dennis, Carl Jung – the influential thinker chappie…though it does sound like something Ron Dennis would say). But for those of us who don’t like reading about “collective unconscious” even if our lives depended on it, we can just resort to sending Kimi four-leaf clovers in our spare time hoping the rotten luck will eventually pass. I read somewhere that turning around a turtle on its back brings good luck as well, but one can scarcely expect Kimi to fit this activity into his busy schedule…plus we don’t want him carted off to the loony bin either, so the clovers will suffice for now.

One has to feel sorry for poor Felipe as well. It’s bad enough that his elaborate rain dance ritual performed before season-start doesn’t seem to have had much effect (I mean, one can hardly call him reigenmaster), and having Alonso wagging the finger at him in addition had the effect of unleashing an impressive string of expletives and a hitherto unknown vocabulary (I must admit that I have been regarding Massa with a certain newly-found respect ever since). To top it all off, to actually arrive at the podium only to find Michael Schumacher standing there wearing something that looked like it was stripped off from the living room curtains and hastily patched up together clearly wiped the smile off Felipe’s face for the rest of the podium ceremony. One can’t really blame him, it took us a few minutes too to recover from the shocking wardrobe choice, before we could get ourselves to cheer for the 7 time world champion.

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Meanwhile, the Italian press is inexplicably siding with Fernando Alonso over Felipe Massa in their little exchange of words. “No one can justify Massa’s exaggerated reaction to Alonso’s criticism” claims La Gazetta dello Sport – which is rather puzzling, because it is not like we have never heard a F1 driver use an expletive before. In fact, I am sure one of the main reasons team radio isn’t included in the telecast is because this might make F1 races unsuitable for a young audience, which is clearly not what Bernie wants. That and the minor inconvenience that everyone will know each other’s strategy during the race. Niki Lauda chips in with a helpful suggestion for Felipe – “He should have just shown him (Nando) the middle finger. There is no need to get so excited”. Yes, showing someone the middle finger is the calm, composed and dignified route to take, no doubt. “Why Massa drove straight into Alonso, I cannot understand” adds Lauda, “Childishness, Carelessness or Brazilian Temper?”. Talking of childishness, no one can dare accuse Felipe of the same when Ron Dennis is still around at large giving intense competition in this department. Behaving like a particularly immature five year old on the podium and ridiculing a retired F1 legend isn’t the best way to convince everyone about Ron’s ‘sense of righteousness’ I would have thought. And looks like Lewis doesn’t have stringent rules on “permissible levels of happiness based on finishing positions” unlike Nando, for Ron certainly didn’t look like he was holding back on the celebrations just so Lewis didn’t start feeling ‘uncomfortable’. Incidentally what did you think of Lewis being crane-lifted back into contention after sliding off the race track? Pretty cool, huh? It was thought that having Lewis stuck in the gravel far away from the race track constituted a grave safety concern, which they set out to mitigate by bodily lifting the car and driver using a crane and placing them back on a live track (and that is not dangerous at all, I am sure). This sport will never cease to surprise.

Eleven days to go for the next grand prix, and less than a day to go for the Paris hearing. Forza Ferrari.

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